Nicole & Ryan: 10 Years Together
Your favourite couple of Anne Hunter Studio, Nicole and Ryan are celebrating ten years together this month. What a milestone! This length of time is a period many of us aspire to reach later down the road, never mind in our thirties. It’s genuinely such an achievement so we’re celebrating these two by sitting down with them and getting some insight on what they’ve learned in these ten years, what they’re most proud of and what they’re looking forward to in the next decade.
Steph: First off, let’s start at the very beginning! Tell us how you two met.
Nicole: The first time we met was actually at a party in school! Ryan had just finished performing a show I had seen him in and we both ended up at the same event afterwards. We struck up a conversation and though we didn’t speak after that for a number of months (due to the summer break) we ran into each other at auditions for a show on campus and picked up like no time had passed.
Ryan: Technically we first met once before this but we really got to connect in university after auditioning & successfully getting into the same theatre show AND Improv & Sketch Comedy group. It was only after a month of seeing each other perform (and Nicole idealistically vetting me at a bar before rehearsals) that Nicole invited me over to her’s to play Mario Kart and the rest is history <3
S: What has been your favourite memory together thus far?
N: How do I choose?! Deciding a favourite memory with your partner feels like trying to choose the best of something in a sea of bests. Though I could give you a top 40 list at the drop of a hat what I will say is this. I have a person who, despite whatever we’re doing, will always make that thing fun. Whether it’s something simple like walking in our neighborhood, or something more extreme like hiking around the coast of Ireland, we will always make the best of it because we’re together and create new favourite memories no matter what.
R: Really hard question!! I could talk about our wedding or adventures abroad together, but instead I’m gonna cheat the question and say there’s a collection of many memories in our most beloved coffee shop in Toronto, The Common. The countless times we’d sit at a table reading, working, chatting together are among some of my favourites, all culminating in my proposal to her inside after-hours!
S: What has been your biggest lesson as a couple?
N: Though the metaphor isn’t lost on anyone, I think of long-term relationships as gardens. You have to show up everyday, to cultivate, nurture and work with it. It won’t always cooperate, and most people won’t see all the work you put in except when everything is in bloom, but no matter what the season you are there, tending to its needs and listening to its concerns when the weather, like life, doesn’t do what you expected. But the most important part is that you show up every day, you choose to spend your time on it, and as long as you do, it will grow.
R: Many people tend to talk about compromise being the biggest part of any lasting relationship but realistically this is a part of a larger lesson I’ve discovered in 10 years: Learning to grow and change in the same direction. You have to actively decide to continue down the same life path as partners every single day, which is not to say change who you are to benefit the relationship if it’s not what you want as an individual. There will always be forks in your road as a couple but if it’s the right person, then you’ll both decide to journey forth, hand-in-hand, together.
S: What are you most proud of that you’ve been able to achieve or move through together as a couple?
N: In a decade you are bound to run into a few speed bumps, let alone full road blocks, but despite all of our challenges, we never stopped showing up for eachother, especially when things weren’t easy. Even in the midst of a pandemic (in a 450 sq ft apartment no less) we still made sure to make space and do special things for each other even when it felt like the world was standing still and I will say I’m pretty proud of that.
R: Nicole more than anyone can speak to how existential I can be sometimes, moving through countless jobs & career path changes, all while living through apartment nightmares that made our homes not feel safe. The fortitude Nicole has to help me all the while trying to get her own hopes & dreams on their feet is astounding; I become more & more proud of her every day.
S: How are you celebrating this epic milestone together?
N: There’s something a little magic that happens to us when the fall air hits. We feel like it’s our version of New Years in a way, where we have the ability to step back, take stock and invest in what matters to us. So to celebrate this special time, surrounding ourselves in nature and stepping away from our every day is something we try to accomplish every October and this year is no different. We’ll be heading to a little cabin out of town for a few days and couldn’t be more excited to enjoy the fall.
R: I thought it appropriate to take a trip back into our favourite landscape, the autumn woods. Nothing makes us feel more relaxed and reminds us of our triumphs than a cabin/cottage under a serene forest canopy, reflecting on 10 beautiful years of memories & life as true partners.
S: What are you most looking forward to in the next ten years?
N: Ten years is a long time but I know it won’t feel that way because I get to spend it with my best friend, so more adventures, more laughs, and definitely more coffee.
R: More discoveries together, more time together, more life together.
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